Spiritual Medium

On March 1, 2014 we had an experience with a spiritual medium.  My sister’s good friend Michelle had a prior experience with this particular spiritual medium and she was blown away with what came out during the reading and how accurate the messages were.  Rochelle told me pieces of Michelle’s experience and the more I listened I became increasingly excited about scheduling an appointment for our family.   We decided to propose the idea to Dad but we expected him to be resistant to the idea.  Once he heard Michelle’s story he too was on board with the idea.  March 1, 2014 worked with all of our schedules so Rochelle booked the appointment.  She also spoke with Michelle to let her know our family was interested and to please not share any of our personal stories with the spiritual medium.  Michelle is very trustworthy and is an amazing person.  We knew she wanted us to have an honest experience therefore she did not have contact with the medium prior to our appointment. 

I went in with very little expectations.  Naturally, I was optimistic going into the reading but I was hopeful we would leave with peace. We all had unresolved questions following Mom’s death and we were interested in seeing what the spiritual medium had to offer.  Prior to our meeting with the spiritual medium we were private about our spiritual experiences.  We told family and friends but we did not post personal happenings on social media for everyone to see.  Based on the precise details and the accuracy, we are convinced the spiritual medium has a special gift and we are thankful our paths crossed so we could be provided with answers and closure.

Rochelle and Scott’s living room seemed like the obvious place to meet given the fact that is where Mom passed away.  Our appointment was scheduled for 6:00 that evening.  Dad and Deanna got engaged on February 14, 2014 and Deana asked Rochelle and I to go dress shopping.  We left the kids at home with the guys and off we went.  It was bitterly cold outside.  We went to three stores and ended up finding some really nice options.  Rochelle and I both purchased a dress to wear to their wedding.  We had a wonderful time and it was a great bonding experience.  We had so much fun shopping that we lost track of time.  We called the guys to let them know we were running behind but we were on our way.  Scott, Josh, Deanna and the kids planned an outing so Dad, Rochelle and I would be the only ones present during the reading.

I would like to explain how peaceful the setting was.  This experience did not involve a gypsy fortune teller, tarot cards, a crystal ball, an ouiji board or voodoo dolls.  Her name is Lilly and she refers to herself as a spiritual counselor and life coach.  One would never guess, just by looking at her, that she has this special gift. 

In order to help understand, below is a brief description of Lilly’s take on her special gift and mission as a Spiritual Counselor and Life Coach:

My Spiritual Counseling and Life Coach Sessions are each uniquely designed to help individuals evolve into their true selves in every aspect of their being (mind, body, soul, and spirit). My Spiritual Growth & Life Coach approach focuses on various aspects of our lives while communicating with loved ones whom have passed that are still surrounding us.

As a Life Coach I provide advice and support to people who wish to improve their lives by helping them to solve problems and achieve their desired goals and unresolved issued.

I am spiritual medium, which means I am able to communicate with those souls who have passed from this physical world. As a spiritual medium, I provide you with answers to you from your loved ones that will provide guidance and direction in areas where you feel lost and confused. This is a journey of faith and healing for you and your loved ones.”

Before Lilly arrived Rochelle jokingly said she can see Mom saying, “I have an appointment I have to be at 6:00.  I can’t be late.”  Knowing how Mom liked to plan we agreed with Rochelle.  Lilly arrived around 6:00p.m. and we gathered around the table.  Dad sat in between Rochelle and I and Lilly sat on the opposite side of the table.  As soon as she sat down she could sense how nervous we were.  Rochelle and Dad were somewhat tearful and I was guarded.  I did not know what to expect but I was anxious to get the three hour reading underway.

One of the first things Lilly said was, “There is a lot of energy in this house.”  She pointed out that Rochelle, who was not showing, was pregnant.  Initially we thought there was a 50/50 chance at getting that right but we were somewhat taken back.  She then looked at my Dad and said, “You have experienced significant loss.”  Lilly explained she had visions of a heart and she asked Dad if he lost his wife.  Dad was tearful and he shook his head yes.  Lilly also asked Dad if he recently lost his mother.  This really caught us by surprise given the fact Grams passed away approximately seven months prior.  Lilly also said she kept seeing the number three. She said the number three is important in our lives and we would see the number three unfold as we move forward.  Lilly also wanted us to know that she was getting energy from Mom that Dad and I both looked thinner than she remembered.  We had both just completed a 24 day challenge and lost 31 pounds between the two of us.

Lilly then turned to me and she asked if I had some genetic testing done.   I felt my palms get sweaty and my stomach turned a bit.  I had yet to tell Dad about my actual results of the BRCA2 testing.  I told Josh that if my actual results were revealed during the reading then the spiritual medium is for real.  Lilly said she saw some letters and a number.  She said slowly, “I see the letters B-R-C-A and the number 2.”  Dad pointed out Rochelle and I both got tested and thankfully, “they both came back negative.”  I remember thinking to myself, “This could get very interesting.” 

We spent a significant amount of time talking about Dad being able to move forward with his life following Mom’s passing.  The Catholic Church is important to Dad and he takes the sacraments very serious.  He was born into the Methodist Church and he and Mom were married at St. John’s Catholic Church in Cambridge.  He converted to Catholicism in 1982 shortly after Rochelle was born.  Dad and Deanna had met with several priests to discuss getting married in the Catholic Church.  Unfortunately all of the priests they met with all said the same thing several different ways.  Deanna had previously been married therefore they would have to get an annulment before the church would consider marrying them.  This news was devastating to Dad and Deanna because they desperately wanted to get married in the Catholic Church.  Lilly, who is also Catholic, did a wonderful job explaining to Dad that he is not doing anything wrong by marrying Deanna.  She told Dad to stop talking to the priests and to do what he feels is right.  I cannot remember specifically how it came up during the reading but Dad quizzed Lilly by asking how many priests he had talked to.  Without hesitation, Lilly responded, “five.”  Dad was stunned.  He had talked to five priests about the annulment issue.

Even though Dad and Mom spent a lot of time talking about Dad’s life after Mom’s passing, he wanted confirmation that he was doing the right thing.  Mom and Dad’s love for one another was such a special thing.  Mom knew she was no longer going to be on earth to be with Dad therefore he wanted Dad to move on and to love again.  We reassured Dad that Mom would want him to be happy and he very much appreciated our approval of Deanna and his desire to love again. 

We talked a little bit about Grams.  During the reading, we referred to her as Grams, not Peggy.  Dad continued to be tearful during the discussions about his mom.  Lilly reassured Dad that his mother was very proud of him and was thankful for all Dad did for her throughout her life.  Even though Dad visited Grams at Hillcrest on a regular basis, he always felt like he should do more.  Lilly picked up on energy from Grams and reassured Dad that she was very appreciative for all Dad did for her.  Lilly further explained that Grams knew Dad was busy with the farm, grieving the loss of Mom and busy traveling to be with his grandchildren.  Dad felt very comforted and reiterated that Grams personally told Dad this during her time on earth. 

During the reading, Rochelle asked Lilly if she could actually see Mom and Grams or if she was just picking up “energy.”  Lilly said she could see both Mom and Grams.  She said Mom was standing behind Dad with her hands on Dad’s shoulders.  Grams was not as apparent because Mom had a lot of messages she wanted to deliver so we could continue living without having lingering questions.  We asked what Mom looked like and Lilly said she is very pure, very heavenly and angelic.  She described Mom as being in her late 20s’ or early 30s’.  She said Mom had dark, curly hair.  I immediately thought of a picture that described Mom’s new appearance.  After the reading, I emailed Lilly a picture of Mom from when she was 29 years old.  Lilly confirmed the picture I emailed is how she saw Mom during the reading. 

Lilly explained in her experiences she can tell the difference from souls that have made it to heaven versus those who have not.  She said Mom was glowing, almost as if an aura of light was around her.  She further explained during her lifetime she has experienced seeing souls who have not made it to heaven.  She explained seeing a dark shadow rather than the pureness she was describing from Mom and Grams. 

Lilly then asked Dad if Grams was outspoken.  Rochelle, Dad and I laughed and agreed she in fact spoke her mind!  Lilly also asked us if Grams liked to sing.  Some of the fondest memories I have of Grams is listening to her sing her catchy jingles and whistling to the tune of songs.  It didn’t matter where we were—when Grams felt the need to sing she would burst out tunes that would be sure to make anybody laugh.  Lilly said she heard Grams singing “Peggy Sue.”  Dad paused and as the tears filled up his eyes he said, “That is what Dad used to call Mom.”  We had not referred to Grams as Peggy during the reading.  I did not know Grandpa Schmidt referred to Grams as Peggy Sue and it was another validating moment for us.

Lilly did not know how Dad and Deanna met.  She said she had visions of Dad’s vehicle being pushed by Mom and Grams to Deanna’s place of business.  It sounds like Mom and Grams “tag teamed” and helped push Dad towards Deanna.  Dad and Deanna in fact met at Deanna’s work three weeks after Grams passed away.   Once again, this was another validating moment.  We were definitely intrigued and wanted to know more. 

Mom’s theme of normalcy on earth came out during the reading.  Lilly reported that Mom wanted normalcy for her grandchildren but there was only one Nana. She was agreeable to having the grandkids refer to Deanna as Grandma.  The grandkids now refer to Deanna as “Grandma Dee.” There were also discussions of Dad needing to move forward.  She wanted Dad to remember the wonderful lives they had but she gave Dad the green light to move forward.  Mom’s clothes were still in the closet and all of her pictures were still hung.  With Dad and Deanna being engaged, it was important for Dad to be able to move forward by making room for his new life with Deanna.

I could tell Lilly was making headway with Dad and the annulment issue.  We wanted to know more and we were anxious to hear what Lilly was going to bring up next.  Dad started opening up because he trusted what Lilly was talking about.  He wanted to ask a question that we would only know the answer to in order to validate what she was saying.  Dad asked a very specific question and surprisingly, we received an accurate answer.  Dad question was, “What happened in 1994 when I was angry at God during Nancy’s clinical trial?”  Lilly paused and she responded, “It has something to do with a seatbelt.”  Once again we were in awe.  If you recall the entry titled “Covenant and Mark 11:22” a seatbelt was involved in the incident. As Dad was traveling back to Omaha to be with Mom, he was angry and under a lot of stress.  He asked God to show him He was there.  That is when the headlights from the Covenant tuck were right behind him and Dad slammed on his brakes to signal to the vehicle to give him some space. 

Lilly turned to Rochelle and started talking about her unborn baby.  Rochelle asked if it was a girl or boy and Lilly said that we will have to wait and be surprised.  We tried our hardest to get it out of Lilly but she would not budge.  She said that the unborn baby is supposed to symbolize a new beginning.  Rochelle had lived in fear from her diagnosis as she often worried about the cancer coming back.  Lilly told Rochelle she was seeing a long life with three beautiful children.   She said she was getting a message from Mom that Rochelle was supposed to start being more aware of her environment in terms of eating healthy and using cleaner products.  Rochelle reported that she and Scott had previously talked about eating less processed foods and using natural various household items.  Rochelle’s doctors were unable to say whether or not her diagnosis was caused by environmental factors but she felt the need to be more aware of the food she was eating and the products she was using prior to the reading.

Lilly asked Rochelle if her oldest child was going to school in the fall.  She cautioned Rochelle that Anisten was going to need her hand held a bit as she made the transition.  Rochelle spoke up and said Anisten had a lot of anxiety about going to school because she was afraid of getting shots.

Lilly said she could not tell which child but one of them with “light colored eyes” had the ability see beyond.  We automatically pinpointed Anisten because of all of the sightings of Mom she had reported.  Anisten was also the one who kept talking about the baby in Rochelle’s stomach in the weeks leading up to Rochelle finding out she was pregnant.  Rochelle found out around 5 weeks gestation that she was pregnant.  Anisten was talking about it before the pregnancy could even be detected. 

Lilly asked Rochelle if her youngest daughter and Scott butted heads.  Rochelle agreed that Scott is the disciplinarian but the girls are “daddy’s girls.”  Lilly asked if Kardyn was a little firecracker and kept Rochelle and Scott on their toes.  We all laughed and agreed that Kardyn definitely has a mind of her own.  Lilly reported that Mom has an influence on Kardyn’s behavior.  Mom never got the opportunity to really get to know Kardyn due to the timing of Mom’s illness.  Mom always said she hoped Scott and his college roommates had daughters so they could see how unnerving it was to send daughters to college.  Mom of course said this jokingly and she and Scott had a wonderful relationship.  When Kardyn starts acting up we now laugh and say, “Nana!”

Another topic that Lily talked about during the reading was Mom’s gratitude towards Rochelle and Scott for opening up their home to Mom during her terminal illness.  This really touched us and we all started crying.  If you have been following our story, you will recall that Mom put a lot of thought into whether or not she could stay in Gretna because she did not want to leave bad memories in Rochelle and Scott’s home associated with her illness and death.  Rochelle was so happy this came out during the reading and it confirmed their decision to graciously give up their home and lives during Mom’s illness. 

Approximately two hours had passed and we were anxious to continue to learn more.  I was happy for Dad and Rochelle with everything that had been discussed but I was feeling a bit left out.  I asked Lilly if she was picking up any energy from Mom about me.  Lilly turned to me and she said I have a shield and it is very hard for Mom to come to me in my dreams.  I am not a crier but this touched me because I knew it was true.  When Mom was diagnosed, I felt the need to take on her role of strength for our family.  I never considered myself a strong person but as Mom’s health faded, I needed to step up to be the rock she had always been for me and my family.  Lilly pointed out that I always portray “everything this fine” and “I’ve got this.”  Lilly’s description of myself could not have been more accurate or true!  I tend to harbor my feelings and not allow others to really know how I am feeling.  

Lilly said that Mom is throwing signs in my path but I am not paying attention to them.  I immediately thought of the random strings I was finding but I did not give a hint to Lilly.  I wanted to see if she could specifically identify the signs I was receiving.  I asked her “Like what?” She said she was seeing something crafty as well as a coin.  I was completely taken back!  I told Lilly and I had been finding random strings and Josh found a coin in his underwear.  She said Mom is very good about manipulating earthly items.  I am definitely not a crafty person so I am not sure what the significant of the strings are.  Lilly said Mom wants something to be made from the strings.  “The strands will be stitched together forever much like the love she has for you is endless.”

Lilly also pointed out that Mom loved Rochelle and I equally but differently.  She said we are two different people and she had to show signs in a different way to get our attention. I remember having a conversation with Mom years ago.  She said that she of course loved both Rochelle and I equally but because of our vastly opposite personalities, she loved us both in a different way.  

After the strings discussion, the genetic testing got brought up again.  I was happy because I felt the time was ‘now’ to tell Dad about my status.  Enough time had passed and with Deanna being in Dad’s life, I knew Dad could handle hearing the truth.  Lilly talked about the BRCA2 testing and I jumped in and said, “..and I tested positive.”  It felt as if time stood still.  Dad turned to his left and looked right at me.  “What?”  I told Dad not to worry and I had a plan.  I reassured him that I had been going to the breast cancer prevention center and I had an appointment with a breast surgeon on March 18, 2014 to discuss the next step.  Dad was not excited about the news.  In fact, fear overwhelmed him and he did not know how to respond.  He started weeping and asking me if I had cancer.  I reassured him I did not have cancer but I felt as if my credibility with him was lessened when he learned of my status.  It was my nature to tell Dad I had it under control and Lilly pointed out the shield she previously talked about.  She told me it was okay to not have it all figured out and under control.  It was hard for me to accept this but I knew I had unintentionally created a barrier by not allowing people to know my true feelings.  As a side note, I really felt like I had this situation under control.  I had nearly 18 months to understand the information and to make an informed and education decision.  Josh was behind me 100% so all in all, I felt very comfortable with my status and decision. 

Lilly brought up the fact that Josh was supportive but he is a man who does not say much.  Josh is a man of few words as he is always methodically thinking.  Lilly said she kept seeing something almost like a hamster running in a ball.  She compared it to Josh’s mind.  Lilly reminded me of the conversation Josh and I had when we first found out about me testing positive for BRCA2.  Lilly said that Josh is more worried about me than he is leading on and she talked about how Josh did not want to be left behind as a single parent to our three boys.  I had forgotten about the conversation until Lilly brought it up.  Lilly also provided me with confirmation that I did the right thing by not telling Mom the actual results of my test.  Lilly reported that Mom understood why I chose not to share the actual results when I first found out.  Hearing this brought me tremendous peace and comfort.

During the reading, Lilly kept seeing Mom holding the hand of a little girl.  She could not exactly figure out what it meant but it was definitely a reoccurring theme throughout the reading.   Lilly could not tell if whether the girl she was seeing was me when I was little or if it was symbolic to the longing for the daughter I never had.   She said there is something big for me planned after my surgery but because I still had my shield up, she could not tell what the big thing was.  I was told this “big event” is something outside of my comfort zone.  Since the reading, I received an email from Lilly stating that the “baby chapter is definitely still alive” in our lives.  Time will tell whether or not this premonition proves to be true but for now, our three boys are keeping us very busy!

Lilly talked about a couple things that happened in the days leading up to Mom’s funeral.   If you recall, we could not find Mom’s earrings in her antique soap dish the morning of our meeting with the funeral director.  Dad, Rochelle and I all looked for the earrings.   We dumped out the soap dish and separated all of the items.  The earrings were not there.  Later that evening Scott found the earrings in the soap dish after we returned from a full day of funeral planning. 

During the reading, Lilly said she was seeing some earrings.  I immediately jumped in and said I had worn a pair of Mom’s earrings every day since Mom passed away. I had not packed very well when I got the call from Dad about putting Mom on hospice.  Mom had a pair of beautiful silver earrings she purchased when I was with her a few years prior.  When we were home for the funeral I needed a pair of earrings so I grabbed the silver ones.  After I told the story, Lilly said that is not the energy she was getting.  She said the earrings she was seeing were gold and an incident involving Scott.   We shared the story of Scott finding the earrings and Lilly reported that was Scott’s shining moment.  Scott knew there was nothing he could say to make losing Mom easier so finding the earrings was his contribution. 

The next story really made us feel that Lilly was onto something.  She described one of Mom’s very close friends.  Lilly said this friend was almost like a sister but they were not blood related.  Dad, Rochelle and I knew she was describing Mom’s childhood friend, Kem (Nelson) McConville.  Lilly said that Kem had a private conversation with Mom’s body the day before the funeral.  Kem was alone in the viewing room at the funeral home when she leaned over and whispered to Mom, “I will do anything I can for your family.  I am here for them.”  At the time of the reading we had no way of confirming the conversation Lilly was describing.  That Sunday, on our way home from Gretna, I called Kem to ask her about the conversation Lilly described during the reading.  Kem did not know about our experience the night before with the spiritual medium.  Kem proceeded to tell me about the private conversation she had during Mom’s visitation.  The details of the conversation were essentially verbatim to how Lilly described it. This was yet another validating moment.

During the beginning of the reading, Lilly talked about how we would see the number three during our lives.  In the spring of 2014 my dear friend Dena and I started running in 5k races.  I asked Josh to pick up my race packet the day before ‘Jadon’s Bug Run.’  When I got home from work, I opened the folder and when I looked at my bib number for the race it was “333.”  I felt Mom’s presence and was excited to run knowing she would be with me every step of the way.   

 

Approximately one month after the reading, I had a night where I could not sleep.  I woke up at 3:00 a.m.  I tossed and turned what seemed like forever.  When I turned to look at the clock, it was 3:03 a.m.  I did not think much of it until the next time I looked at the clock and it was 3:13 a.m.  I found myself smiling and thinking of Mom.  I finally went back to sleep and when I woke up it was 3:33 a.m. I am not sure what the significance of this event was but it definitely made me laugh and be productive!  I could not sleep so I decided to send an email to Rochelle and Dad to tell them about the “night of the 3s.”  When I was done sending the email, I got ready for work and drove to the office.

We went a half hour over our scheduled time with Lilly.  When we were done we called Josh, Scott and Deanna to let them know they could come back to the house.  They had been circling the subdivision for thirty minutes.  Unfortunately the kids all fell asleep so they did not have a fun night out like they planned.  Instead, they drove around Omaha and Gretna for nearly three and a half hours during a small snow storm.  I went outside to help carry in the kiddos.  As soon as I saw Josh I told said, “Dad now knows about my genetic results.”  Josh smiled at this finding.  Naturally, all of the kids woke up when they were carried inside.  We sat in the living room and told the awesome stories that came out during the reading.  I couldn’t help but notice Deanna crying as we were talking.  I was not sure if she was overwhelmed with the information or what was wrong.  She later told me she was worried about my genetic status and knew Dad was also worried.

I have known Josh for 11 years and I can count on one hand how many times I have seen him cry.  He often sees both sides of arguments and he typically plays “the devil’s advocate.”  He was very tearful during our discussion as was Scott.  They were both taken back but the amount of information as well as the accuracy of the stories that were discussed during our time with Lilly.

The experience with the spiritual medium was very therapeutic and we feel whole again.  We continue to miss Mom every day but we are definitely at peace following the reading.  We are so thankful our paths crossed with Lilly and that she has the gift of communicating with those who have gone before us. 

In honor of Grams and our fulfilling spiritual experience on March 1, 2014 below is a link to Buddy Holly’s song, “Peggy Sue.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ku5UeUT7yIQ